I loved you child
From the moment I knew of you
*
I was there for your first
Breath
Word
Step
First mashed bananas
Smeared on your soft, plump cheeks
The whole body shudder
At your first taste of peas
I ate them first, said yum!
So you ate them too
Then spit them right out
I laughed
I remember
Your baby giggle
Your tiny, gentle fingers
Reaching for my smile
*
I was there
For every heart
Ache
Break
Boys, school, friends, wins
Losses
Seeing it in the slump of your shoulders
The weight of the world
In every word you
Never had to say
*
I was there
Telling you what you needed to
Know
Don’t forget your key
Put a jacket on I’m cold just looking at you
The boy always comes to the door to get you
The boy always opens the door for a lady
Hang up your bath towel so it doesn’t get mildewed
Put the toothpick in the center of the cake
To make sure it’s done
Use a Q-Tip, girl, to clean up your eyeliner
If it smudges
Yes, boy, you have to wear deodorant
Yes, boy, every day
Look the other person in the eyes
When you shake hands
Shake like you mean it
When you apologize
Say it like you mean it
Buckle your seat belt
Take the turns
Slow
*
I was there for all of it, I know
I remember every day like
One lazy, never-ending river
Was there ever a time
Without you?
*
Now you tell me you know
Because I’ve already told you
I tell you again
I say it’s not for you
It’s for me
I’m old
I forget stuff
We laugh
I remember the tenderness
of your baby fingers
on my cheek
*
I loved you child
From the moment I knew of you
Funny, it’s hard to find love
Yet with the mere knowledge of you
My heart
Grew
*
Living every day
Thinking of you
Worrying about you
Making the sandwiches
Picking up the towels
Washing the clothes
Cooking the dinners
Wiping away the tears
Calming the fears
Driving you wherever
You need to go
*
The hardest thing
I’ve ever had to do
Is hold you
Soothing not solving
While you cried in my arms
Holding your hurt in my heart
As if it were my own
My hands always outstretched
To catch you
If you fall
*
Seasons are changing
We stand together
Side by side on the ledge
Look down at the water
Clear yet deep
Look at each other
Count to three
Jump
*
You still call me Mommy
I still say “What-ee?”
We both still giggle
*
I loved you, child
From the moment I knew of you
I will love you
Always
Forever
Just because you’re you
Mommy
Tonight’s musical inspiration from my friend Ben. It has just the right tempo for what I was trying to say. It was a beautiful day here in Chicago today, sunny and 75 degrees, a rare treat this time of year. I wanted to go to sleep early. But this. Turning in the back of my mind for days. Trying to find the words, the shape, the form. The music helps me find it. Frame it. Tell the story that needs to be told. It’s raining a little as I read this again. Refine. Listen to what my heart wants to say. Make sure the words are honest and true.
Riverboxx 
Christy, that’s beautiful ☺
Thank you!